Punk & Perv: The One Where Punk Goes To College
by Punk-and-Perv
Summary: P&P THREE: Punk has a plan. Perv doesn't stand a chance. WARNING: Sock bondage and below table blowjobs. Spanks for reading! Im/mature themes.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: These are not Stephenie Meyer's boys. They have way too much fun.

Thank you dellaterra!

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><p>How well do you know Punk &amp; Perv?<p>

Read about how they met here: http:/www. fanfiction. net/s/6872628/1/Punk_and_Pervs_Excellent_Adventure

Read about their first time here: http:/www. fanfiction. net/s/7077723/1/Punk_Perv_The_One_Where_Perv_Says_Yes

* * *

><p><span>Perv<span>

Tomorrow.

I told him I would visit him tomorrow. I have to work; he just has to be good until then.

At ten a.m. he sent a text. Oops, he doesn't have any clean shirts. He hopes Dr. Cullen doesn't mind if he is dirty.

At one p.m. he sent a picture of his cock. He's horny; he wants it sucked.

Just now, he sent a video of him jerking off in the university library, shooting jizz into his hand while I can hear people talking in the background.

He moans my name as he comes.

I drive fast.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Jasper points out the freakishly angry-looking dude pacing up and down outside the library. I squeal, then cover my mouth. The hot librarian dude presses one finger to his lips, hushing me.

I blow him a kiss.

He blows one back.

Fist-pumping in slow motion, I moonwalk over to the door and press my nose against the glass.

It's Perv!

So hot.

So pissed.

So YUM.

When he finally looks up, I do the robot. I know he likes that. He's just pretending when he shakes his fucking head and starts to walk away.

He's missed me.


	2. Chapter 2

Perv

Fuck. I told myself I didn't miss him but that's kind of what it feels like.

I'm mad as hell at his stupid stunts, but when he dances like an idiot, I have to turn away to hide my smile.

It's fucking confusing.

Collecting myself, I remember why I'm here and storm into the library.

Punk is flipping through a copy of _The Wall Street Journal_. When I reach him, I push the newspaper down so that he can see my face.

It takes a moment, but he finally looks up.

"Oh hey, what are you doing here?"

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Squirming in my seat a little, I glance at the librarian's desk, wondering if he would notice if I blew my angry man right here.

While he folds my paper back into shape – all lined-up pages and super-sharp creases – I look at his fingers. Damn. The whole time he's folding, he whispers what a fucking incredible pain in the ass I am. He hasn't had an hour of peace all fucking week, and can't I manage for five fucking minutes on my own?

I point at the jizz stain on my t-shirt, make my helpless face, shrug and shake my head.


	3. Chapter 3

Perv

When he points at the stain, I feel like I'm going to explode. I grab his shirt, drag him to the nearest aisle and press him against the bookshelf. It rattles and something falls.

I whisper in his ear that he'd better cut this shit out. I'm not his fucking toy. I have a fucking job and a fucking life and if he doesn't keep his cock in his pants, I'm not going to give him what he wants.

He whimpers and says he has no idea what I'm talking about.

I say he's a fucking liar and grab his ass hard.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I love his hands on my ass.

His cursing in my ear is deliciously hot, and I shiver in his arms. I know he's pretending to be pissed; I can feel the swell of his dick as he unconsciously humps a little, then steps away.

He squints, looking stern, and gripes about how pissed he's been at all my lovely texts and homemade pornos.

It really isn't important what he thinks; it's just important that he comes whenever I call, and so far he has.

It's fun.

I tell him that I've forgotten his lesson about how to do my laundry.


	4. Chapter 4

Perv

I growl when he tells me it's my own fucking fault he doesn't have clothes for class. His shirt was already smelly and now it's covered in come.

When I say he would know how if he paid attention for three fucking minutes, he just shrugs.

I don't doubt that he'd go to class buck-naked so I grab his hand and walk out to the courtyard.

He goes on about his classes and how he swears he bought books but has no idea where they are. I turn to tell him to get a fucking backpack when something hits my face.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Shit.

Jake looks as pissed as hell to see me with my man, but not as pissed as James does to get a fist to the face.

I tell Jake off – doesn't he know it's rude to hit old people? – then duck when the fists start flying.

I really didn't mean for this to happen. It was an honest mistake when I texted my dickshot to the wrong dude first. And to my professor, even though he's hot.

Fucking iPhone.

Pushing Jake off – and giving his pecs a little squeeze while I can – I drag my man away.

Fuck, he's all bloody again.


	5. Chapter 5

Perv

Fuck. I think that fucker broke my nose. He must be on steroids. It's just not natural.

It doesn't keep me from fighting back though. Especially when he starts yelling about how I'd better get my hands off _his_ man.

Riley drags me away and I yell at Jake that he's fucking delusional. He's wanted Riley forever and making up shit is just fucking pathetic. Jake screams that I'm the crazy one and he has the fucking pictures to prove it.

I freeze, then I look at Riley. He says oops.

I turn to tackle the fucker again.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

They circle each other, crouching, and I picture them in those little Sumo-wrestler loincloth things. They would look adorable.

Jake growls, and feints a punch before hitting the ground with his arm twisted behind his back. He howls, and my dirty street-fighter grins, dripping blood onto Jake's shoulder blades.

I feel a little nauseous.

I feel a little horny.

When Jake struggles free, I scream like a girl, then hide behind Jasper, who's come out to film the entertainment. We both drool when the librarian comes out and puts Jake flat on his back again with one cool move.

UNF.


	6. Chapter 6

Perv

Everyone here is fucking crazy.

I'm wiping the blood from my face as the dude from the library walks away from Jake. It was like he was flipping a pancake instead of a monster.

Punk yells at Jasper to make sure he gets it all on tape. But Jasper looks like he's in shock. He mutters "Paul" and "so fucking hot" over and over again.

Jake rolls over and moans. He tells me to find someone my own age and I growl for him to delete the fucking pictures.

Riley humps my leg and says he's horny, let's go fuck.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I have no idea why he's so irritated with me.

Stalking off toward the dorms, he doesn't even look back to see if I'm following. I make faces, grumble and drag my feet, then do some visible sulking while he waits for me to unlock the main door.

When I turn to take the stairs he grabs me by the neck and pulls me right up to his gorgeous, bloody face.

He'll fuck me all right. He'll fuck me 'til I cry. I think he knows I'd like that.

But first he wants me to wash the blood out of his shirt.


	7. Chapter 7

Perv

I look like a fucking criminal, all cut up and bleeding. I don't give a shit what other people think about me but hell if I'm going to get arrested again.

I strip my shirt off and hand it to Punk, who sticks his lip out to pout. Until I take off his. Waving it in front of his face I tell him he can't fucking jack off in public anymore and I'd better be the only one who sees pictures of his cock.

I'm not sure he's listening to me. He's too busy shoving his hands down my pants.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

The way he bats my hands away and makes me take him to the laundry room is cruel. All I want to do is touch him. I haven't seen him in AGES.

But he's insistent, shoving me down the hallway, pushing me into the room and throwing his shirt into the sink.

Frowning hard, he tells me – again – that I have to rinse blood out with cold water first. Then he hurls our shirts into the washer, explaining slowly and carefully – again – how much detergent to use.

I blink and smile and nod.

He's done my laundry for the last four weeks.

Sucker.


	8. Chapter 8

Perv

Fuck, he's not paying attention. Again. He nods and shit but I can tell he's still thinking about fucking. He's always thinking about fucking. Or surfing. Or dancing.

This means I'm probably going to have show him again. Maybe I should tell him that if he does it himself, he'll get a reward.

Once the washer is going I press his back against it. I lean against him and whisper in his ear that I'll spank him hard if he learns to do his own laundry. He looks at me with wide eyes and I grab his dick.

He groans.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I ask him how hard and he squeezes my dick.

Pushing him away, I turn and bend over the washer, then look over my shoulder and ask again. This time I sound a little demanding, and he takes a step back.

Fumbling with my fly, shoving my pants down, I wiggle my ass and ask him nicely.

I hardly whine at all.

His breathing sounds harsh when he bends over me and rubs up against my crack. Damn, his belt catches me a little. This time I keep my mouth shut. I'm not completely stupid.

He asks if I would like a preview.


	9. Chapter 9

Perv

He says _yes, please_ and because he asks so nicely I decide to do it.

It's been a while since I spanked him; usually he's so damn naughty. But fuck, his ass is so fucking perfect and I'm so fucking turned on.

I hold my hand up in the air and watch him wriggle in anticipation. Then I bring it down – hard.

He moans, his body shaking from the machine. I watch him grind against it and palm my dick at the sight of his pink skin.

If we keep going this way, I'll have to wash my jeans too.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

UNF

Instant head rush.

Waiting for him to spank me again is delicious torture. Each second stretches out – long, thin and endless – until my vision dims and I remember to breathe.

Dragging in a breath, I try not to growl while he chuckles. If I make a sound, he'll back off. If I engage my smart mouth, he'll stop. I need him to continue right now. I've waited for fucking ages.

Shoulders sagging, forehead pressed against the washer, I feel his rough palm rub against my right ass cheek.

I shiver.

When he spanks my left cheek, I yelp.


	10. Chapter 10

Perv

It gets better every time.

The way he catches his breath and holds still, trying _so hard_ to be good.

The way his ass turns red, then pink. The way my mark is left there.

The way he moans and tries to guess when the next one is coming.

Gently I rub his ass.

Leaning forward, I press my chest against his back and whisper for him to pull up his pants.

He looks up at me and pouts. I shake my head. He whines and stomps his foot.

I kiss his neck and run my fingers through his hair.

"Later."

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Later?

LATER?

Do. Not. Want. Later.

I hump back against his crotch and damn, he's rock hard. Later is just wrong.

Looking around, I spy several baskets of folded laundry next to the dryers. Shimmying out from under him, even though that means I lose the lovely licks of his tongue tracing across my shoulders, I toe off my shoes and step out of my jeans.

Tipping out the laundry, I make a comfy looking nest on the floor and get on my back.

When I tell him to fuck me right here, right now, he purses his lips.


	11. Chapter 11

Perv

Damn spoiled brat. He gets whatever the fuck he wants.

This time though, I fucking want it too. How can I not, with his legs spread wide and his cock so hard?

My jeans are off in no time and I kneel between his legs. I kiss him kind of rough, and press my body to his.

I push against him – one long thrust pushing him deeper into the pile of clothes.

_Now now now_, he says. I tell him to shut up and be patient.

I lick his neck. I bite his ear.

Then I reach for the lube.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

He fumbles through his pockets, and I feel a wash of pride at the way his hands shake. Then he grumbles a little and reaches for my discarded pants.

Fuck.

No lube?

Again?

If I wasn't so frustrated right now, the look on his face would crack me up. He's beyond pissed and looks even more irate when I tell him to just spit and shove.

He's not doing that, he says; he's not interested in hurting me.

I roll over and point exaggeratedly at my rosy cheeks.

He asks if I have some upstairs, and I shoot to my feet.

Yes!


	12. Chapter 12

Perv

I've never seen him put clothes on so quickly. Usually he's peeling them off left and right.

He puts on my pants by accident. They're a little long; I like it.

He says we'll come back later for our shirts and we race up the stairs.

I hope his annoying roommate Seth isn't there. He follows us around everywhere.

The door is wide open. Fuck.

I'm _this close_ to telling the little fucker to get the hell out when I see that it's not Seth sitting in the room.

Shocked, I turn to Punk.

_Who the fuck is he?_

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

My pervert's expression is beautiful – all frowny glares and deep suspicion – as he stands by my bed. He's so cute in my too-short jeans. I think he should wear them all the time. When he turns to shut the door, the rip below his asscheek makes me bite my lip.

He's so gorgeous.

By the time he's turned back, I've got my _serious business_ face on. I introduce him to my professor like it's completely normal to find him in my room.

He shakes James' hand, then asks if he can have a private talk with me about my cell phone.

Oops.


	13. Chapter 13

Perv

I answer for him. _Fuck no_.

For one thing, his fucking professor – his fucking hot professor – shouldn't be in his fucking dorm room.

For another, Punk has a raging boner. He humps things when he's horny. No way in hell I'm going to let him hump what's his name... Dr. Carlisle Cullen.

No. Fucking. Way.

I demand to know what he needs to talk to Riley about that can't wait for class.

The professor blinks at me calmly, which just makes me want to punch him in the face.

Inappropriate pictures, he says, then he fucking winks.

My fists clench.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

It's such fun to see Perv good and angry in a confined space. I inch closer to Dr. _Call me Carlisle _Cullen and drop to my knees.

I think that we are all aware that my half naked, bloody man is growling, but Carlisle and I ignore him. I place my hands on his knees and tell him that I'm so very, very sorry for sending him inappropriate penis pictures, and that it had been an accident.

"All twelve of them?"

I nod solemnly.

"And the video?"

I shake my head no.

That one was on purpose.

He pats my hand.


	14. Chapter 14

Perv

Twelve pictures.

TWELVE.

And a fucking video.

I don't know what to do. I can't believe my ears. I want to beat the hell out of the professor just knowing that he's seen my boy's dick. Then I want to spank Punk until he cries.

What was he thinking?

I'm frozen in place until I see Dr. Fuckface pat Punk's hand. Like he's telling him it's okay.

It's not okay; it's not fucking okay.

I want to kick his ass. I want him to suffer.

Some things are worth going to jail for.

I hit him. He hits the wall.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

When Seth bangs his way back in to our room, he finds me on top of James, who in turn is on top of Dr. Dickshot.

Seth giggles wildly and asks if he can play too.

I throw him my best moody look and drop some kisses on my perv's broad shoulders then hump him a little, marking him as mine.

Seth flips me off and pulls Dr. Cullen away, asking if he has time for a one-to-one tutorial; he can't seem to grasp Anatomy. Dr. Cullen says it would be his pleasure, then reminds me that he'll see me tomorrow – alone.


	15. Chapter 15

Perv

Fuck that.

There's no way I'm leaving Punk alone with that pervert. I'll fucking handcuff him to me before that happens.

One look at my face and Punk pushes them into the hallway. He tells Seth not to come back for at least a few hours and then slams the door in his face.

I tell Punk he'd better not send out any more of those fucking pictures. I'd better be the only one seeing pictures of his cock.

Punk rolls his eyes and reminds me that just an hour ago I was pissed that he sent me pics.

"Mixed signals," he says.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Perv bitches and moans about the quality of the student welfare, and who the fuck would employ such a pervert?

How is it that kids having their first experience away from home – vulnerable kids, real innocents – end up with some perverted letch as their role model?

I bite my lip.

Then I stop him and bite his lip instead.

He kisses me, then carries on grumbling right into my mouth until I huff.

Shoving me off him, he frowns impressively then stalks to and fro across my room.

Arms crossed, head down, he mumbles something about home and safe and together.


	16. Chapter 16

Perv

Suddenly, I want to run away. Like the day we met, I want to throw him over my shoulder and run. Take him someplace else, where I'm the only pervert around. Keep him safe.

Punk whispers that it'll be okay and he'll drop the class if he needs to and who needs to learn about Anatomy anyway?

He wraps his arms around me and kisses my lips, my neck, my chest.

My fingers trace over his scar. When I sigh, he whispers against my lips that he wants me to fuck him, right now.

He pushes me down onto the bed.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I really need him to let me move in.

When I stay over at his place, my brain doesn't jump from thought to thought to thought. He helps me to feel settled.

If I can convince my almost-perfect dipshit to let me stay, then maybe I'll always have clean shirts, and I might make it to the right lectures from time to time.

He could take me surfing and help me improve my grades.

I've tried being really naughty but that takes a lot of thought. It would be easier if I could convince him in another way.

I drop to my knees.


	17. Chapter 17

Perv

Jesus, he feels good.

When he's not being a little shit, he really knows how to make me happy. He sucks hard, swirling the metal on my cock with his tongue. I groan loud then he sucks a little harder.

Hardly anything is better than this, except when we're fucking. Or when he grins that crazy-ass smile.

That smile does shit to me that I can't fucking explain.

When he looks up at me, questioning, I nod. Yes, it feels good. So fucking good.

I'm about to come when I hear a phone ring. It's coming from his pants.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I manage to get his cell out of my borrowed pants pocket before he realizes that I've stopped sucking his dick.

Answering for him, I say hello and then jump up as he starts grabbing at me. Then I dart around to the other side of my desk.

Watching him stumble with my pants around his ankles makes me giggle. He mimes smacking my ass, so I shove his pants down and bend, blowing him kisses.

The whole time I keep up a commentary of _mm- hmms _and _yeses_ and _of course we'll be theres._

Dinner with his mom sounds fun!


	18. Chapter 18

Perv

Wait... What?

I was so distracted by my boy's ass that I wasn't paying attention.

"Dinner," he says, "with your mother."

Fuck.

I groan, and not in a good way.

"What?" He asks innocently, peering over his shoulder at me.

"You know what," I say, and pout. I might have learned a few things from him.

Punk puts on his serious face, and tells me to cut it out. _It'll be fun_, he says, then wiggles his eyebrows and shakes his ass.

Distracted again, I lean over for a small bite.

"You are _so_ bad," I say, then bite harder.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I consider arguing.

I'm not bad at all. I'm very, very good.

Sometimes.

I demonstrate how good I can be when I drape myself over the bed and let him bite my ass some more. Damn, his teeth are so sharp.

I let him bite his way right up to my neck, until he's stretched out over me with his dick pressed between my asscheeks.

Finally, I prove my goodness by passing him some lube and suggesting that he find somewhere to apply it. I even wiggle my butt, just to give him a hint.

Sometimes he's a little slow. Just sayin'.


	19. Chapter 19

Perv

Sometimes he makes it really hard to be mad at him. Like now, when he's squirming underneath me, my cock between his cheeks.

What the fuck was he thinking, making plans with my mother without asking me?

He knows how I feel about her.

On one hand, I want to give him a piece of my mind. On the other, I'm fucking horny.

Punish him? Or fuck him?

I can't help but smile.

I'll do both.

I sit up, then yank at his hips. He has his _I get what I want_ grin.

I'll give him what he wants... eventually.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I love it when he pulls me over his lap like I'm a bad, bad boy. The way his palm circles over my ass is so far beyond hot.

It's hotter than the way Dr. Cullen looks at me in his lab – all lingering stares and adjusting his pants.

It's hotter than the way Jake pinged me right back when I accidentally sent him my dickshot – all _I need you, I need you, I need youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu._

Way hotter.

But nothing is as hot as Perv's fingertip – tap, tap tapping – just before he slides it in.

When he stops, I whine.


	20. Chapter 20

Perv

It's not his _pay attention to me_ whine, or his _can't you write my paper for me_ whine. It's not even the whine he uses when I leave his dorm room at night.

It's his _need you now – right fucking now_ – whine. Which is exactly what I was going for.

I take my time adding more lube, then I slide my finger in. He whimpers and pushes back against me. I wiggle it just a little and he moans.

When a chuckle escapes my lips, he looks up at me and glares.

He's so fucking cute when he's pissed.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

He's such a snot. The way he dips his head while grinning evilly doesn't reassure me.

He only looks like that when he's about to stop. If he stops, I'll bite him, just like I did at Edward's pool party. That time he'd been teasing me, then tried to swim away. He didn't like it when I swam underneath him and bit his thigh.

If he stops, I'll bite him even higher up.

He makes his kissy face and then slides his finger even further in.

So good. He starts to slide in another, and it stings.

I wriggle, needing more.


	21. Chapter 21

Perv

Horny and pissed. He's obviously both. It's just hard to tell which one he is more.

The way he wiggles tells me he's horny; the way he glares tells me he's pissed.

I'm not pissed anymore, at least not for now, but I'm definitely fucking horny.

Between fucking and punishing, fucking wins.

Just as I reach for a condom from his dresser, Punk snaps his teeth.

I don't think, I just slap – hard.

No more of that biting shit.

Punk moans – loud – then tells me to hurry up and fuck him. I tell him he needs to be fucking patient.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I'm shoved from his lap and left sprawling, hanging onto the side of the bed while he makes frustrated _condom wrapper refusing to open_ noises.

Ha!

Lubey fingers FTW!

I want him to hurry but I'm also just enjoying the heat radiating from my ass. He makes me feel every fucking thing so intensely.

When he grabs my ass hard, I groan. The head of his dick is right there, and then in me, and I love it.

So much.

So fucking much.

He takes his time – even though he knows I'd never complain – lifting my ass to get in even deeper.


	22. Chapter 22

Perv

Fuck. I slide in deeper and I almost lose my shit.

It's like he knows just what to do and when to do it. He feels so good I can barely see straight.

I close my eyes and just fucking feel.

His ass is tight. His groans are loud.

One thrust after another, I pound into him, pausing for a moment when I realize that it may be too rough, too soon.

Punk yells that I'd better not fucking stop – not if I want to keep my balls – so I reach around to grab his and squeeze, then thrust again.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Some fool is chanting_ James, James, James_ but I ignore him.

Instead I concentrate on hanging onto the bed, but every time he pounds into me, I'm pushed closer to the edge.

He's got me, he says.

He's got me as he curls an arm around my waist and fucks me harder.

He's got me as he grabs my hair and yanks me back for a kiss that almost misses.

He's got me as I mash my face into the covers, arching my back, shouting for more.

Asking if I'm ready, my James hold me even tighter, then really lets me have it.


	23. Chapter 23

Perv

He groans _yes_, then I'm lost in him again. My mind is gone and my body takes over and my entire world is Riley, just Riley.

I open my eyes – his are closed – and I take him hard, exactly the way I want, exactly the way he needs.

Thrusting, licking, biting – every move is rough.

Moaning, cussing, yelling – every sound is dirty.

He yells _fuck yeah_ and _right fucking there_ and _fuck yeah, James, fuck me harder_, over and over again.

He's mine, I tell him. He fucking belongs to me.

He moans _yes yes yes_ until he screams.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I'm right there.

Held down.

Filled up.

Pushed and pulled and plowed.

James fucks like he's running from the cops – fast and dirty, taking short-cuts – and it's better every single time.

His teeth on my shoulder, fingers bruising my hip, hand wrapped around my dick all get me there. I come making some ridiculous noises. Damn.

James comes too, groaning, saying my name.

Slumping across me – his breath harsh and labored in my ear – I hear his whispered _please, Riley, please_, and I smile.

_Nope_, I tell him.

We are definitely going to dinner with his Mom.


	24. Chapter 24

Perv

Before I can argue he shakes his head, then pats my thigh and tells me we need to get cleaned up.

I drag my feet when he pulls me into the bathroom.

I grumble when he turns on the shower.

I whine when he shoves me in.

Holding him against the wall, I hump him real good. But he says he won't be distracted and pushes me away.

As a last resort, I raise my hand, but he steps out of my reach before I can slap his ass.

I don't understand why he wants to see my mother so badly.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

There is only one thing hotter than a naked pervert of my very own, and that's a _wet_ naked pervert of my very own.

I thought that in the ocean, down at First Beach when he nearly drowned Jake.

I thought that as he laughed at my jizz floating away in cloudy clumps in Edward's pool.

I think it right now in the steamy shower.

He's beyond hot, even when he pouts.

I prod and poke him while he drags his feet.

The quicker we get to dinner, the quicker his mom will convince him to let me live with him.


	25. Chapter 25

Perv

I'm still dressed in my t-shirt and jeans, Punk is wearing a dress shirt. How about that. He does have fucking clean clothes after all.

I already know she's going to tell me I should dress better, then she'll give me shit about my new tattoo. It's Punk's fault we're even here. I should have punished him when I had the chance.

The door opens and there she is, wearing her fucking pearl necklace and pink lipstick – Martha Stewart's evil fucking twin.

"There he is," she says with a big smile. "My sweet boy."

Then she pulls Punk in for a hug.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

While his mom talks nonstop about recipes for cocktails and cake, and how nice it is that I bothered to dress up, I drag my dipshit into the kitchen behind me. He's reluctant.

To look at him you would think he'd been brought up by gypsies or wolves, not by such a loving mother. He's seriously pissed, and the way he glares at me makes my ass tingle in a super-hot way.

Ignoring his simmering temper, I blink, throw out my best helpless look, and then tell her how I can't manage on my own.

This will be easy.


	26. Chapter 26

Perv

It's hard to pay attention when I'm so fucking pissed. All I know is that my mother keeps shaking her head and saying "that's terrible," then giving me dirty looks.

What now?

She tells me that I need to take better care of poor Riley. How is he ever going to pass his classes when he lives in a noisy dorm and fights break out every five minutes? She says it's dangerous and I should know better, and just what exactly was I thinking?

She hands Punk a cookie – even though we're eating dinner soon – and tells me I'd better do something.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Watching my perv sulk is so beautiful, I have to stop myself from touching him, or myself. I really, really want to do both. His pouty bottom lip and nearly silent grumbling make him almost irresistible.

I focus on his mom instead, trying to inhale her martini fumes to get a contact high.

Channeling Bambi, I blink slowly, then let my voice wobble a little before whispering, "Jimmy thinks I should toughen up."

When his mom clutches me to her chest, I grin, but he doesn't smile back at all.

Maybe I've gone too far?

I try to cheer him up.


	27. Chapter 27

We probably should have told you that there's an OT all about the time Punk first met Perv's mom.

It's in the Tsunami collection if you already have that.

Alternatively, hit us up and we'll figure something out. It was a while ago, so I can't quite remember what was in the OT...there was probably some spanking...yeah. Definitely spanking. And sex. Actually, thinking back, I'm certain there were thousands of words about spanking, sex and, somehow, Perv's mom.

* * *

><p><span>Perv<span>

It's hard to keep a straight face when you're getting a handjob.

I have no idea how he's doing it. While his hand moves up and down over the front of my jeans, his face remains completely calm. He could actually be interested in her new cake recipe for all I know.

Except I do know. I know him enough.

Enough to know that he doesn't give a shit about chocolate fucking frosting.

I try, again, to bat away his hand from my now raging boner.

He looks at me and winks, then turns to look at my mother.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Rolling my eyes at his rudeness, I squeeze his dick a little instead of just pressing down over it. Oh yes. He's good and hard.

YUM.

Ignoring the milk she's already placed right by me, I turn and ask his mom for some water instead.

When she heads for the kitchen, he starts up with his _damn you, Punk, you little shit, blah, blah, blah,_ but I have his fly down and his dick out in record time.

I love the way he gasps, like it's really a surprise that I'm going to suck him off right now.


	28. Chapter 28

Perv

I shouldn't be surprised.

When Punk disappears beneath the table, I whisper that he'd better get back up here, _now_. Just as I hear the water running, his lips surround my dick.

Fuck.

I give up telling him to stop. At least he gives really good head.

He sucks hard, then rolls his tongue around the head, swirls my piercing, then licks back down the shaft. I hold in a groan.

At least I'm _trying_ to be quiet. Punk, the little shit, is moaning out loud like he hasn't tasted my dick for ages.

I yell at Mom that Riley prefers bottled water.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

He tastes delicious and I try to get as much of him as I can in my mouth. My idiot doesn't make it easy.

It's like he has a split personality.

He hisses, "Stop it, you little shit," then cups his hand around the back of my head and pushes in a little further.

When I choke, then gag, he strokes my hair, saying _sorry_ without words.

I decide that I must have epic skillz when he tenses; he's ready to blow and I've only been going down on him for a minute.

Then I hear his mom's, "Where's Riley?"


	29. Chapter 29

Perv

WHERE'S RILEY?

I bite my tongue and hope that she doesn't look down.

"Bathroom," I sputter.

Punk hasn't stopped for a second. He's sucking and licking nonstop. It feels so fucking good.

She walks toward the table and sits. If she kicks Riley, it's all over.

I snap that she knows I don't like wine; doesn't she have any beer? And I get a glare. Still, she leaves the table.

"Fuck, Riley," I whisper and groan. A second later I'm coming. It feels incredible... until he lets go and scrambles back into his seat.

My hand is covered in jizz.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

After my starter of cock, I'm hungry for my dinner. I smile at his mom and tell her to sit down and relax; let her son serve her like a proper son should.

She fusses over me a little, smoothing my hair where Mr. _Stop Sucking My Dick _had ruffled it up, and kissing my cheek. She says my mom must be so proud of how thoughtful and well mannered I am; I'm completely adorable.

I don't tell her that my mom doesn't really know me, not the real me, not like she does.

Mom would tell Dad that I'm gay.


	30. Chapter 30

Perv

I'm bright red. Fuck, I need a napkin. Using my clean hand I reach for one on the table, but Punk grabs it before I do. He lays it in his lap and asks again, oh so politely, for the salt.

I have no choice, I wipe the jizz on my jeans, hopefully high enough that my shirt will cover it. Punk and my mother give me a funny look, but I pass the salt.

They wait.

My dick is still hanging out and he knows it.

"Well, I guess I'll serve then," Punk sighs and stands up.

My mother shakes her head.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I serve, making sure that I lean over him a lot to catch sneak peeks of his piercing glinting on his lap.

His mom goes on and on about how she worked so hard on his manners but he's nothing but ungrateful. I sit back down and lean against his shoulder for a moment, then give him all the olives from my salad.

She says I'm perfect, and he sighs. When she's not looking, he leans against my shoulder and I kiss him on the ear.

I mustn't get distracted.

I put my sad face on and tell her that I'm failing all my classes.


	31. Chapter 31

Perv

Her jaw drops; she can't believe what she's hearing.

Neither can I, considering the other night Punk begged me to sleep over, insisting he had finished his schoolwork.

She devours everything he tells her. The dorms are just so noisy, he says. His room is no reprieve; Seth is such a terrible roommate. He has nowhere to study. He even found people having sex (gasp) in the laundry room.

It's not safe either, he says. Just this morning he was studying outside when a massive fight broke out in front of the library.

He just wants to study and feel safe.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

In my head I count to ten, then swallow. Then I count to five and bite my lip. Dropping my head for a count of seven, I take in a shuddering breath just as he groans and she finally flips her fucking shit.

That's it! She's heard enough already. I'm such a delicate soul, always thinking about other people, never putting myself first.

She just saw an episode of Oprah about angels sent to test us. Clutching at her chest, she gasps out, "Oh, Riley, I knew there was something special about you."

Grabbing my hand, she tells me to trust her.


	32. Chapter 32

Perv

I know that look. That look scares me. Some of my worst teenage memories happened because of that look.

When she tells him to trust her, he glances at me, excited. Like he knows this will be terrible for me. Then he tells her that of course he trusts her; after all, he feels like her son already.

I swear she's going to cry.

She drags Punk down the hallway and I stand, forgetting that my fly is still open. I shove my dick back in my pants, then follow.

Oh fuck, not _that _room.

I hear Punk squeal with laughter.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

All the way up the stairs she talks excitedly about how she has the perfect solution, and just wait until I see. Her little hand grabs my wrist – she's surprisingly strong – and I turn, grinning, just in time to see my perv following, dragging his feet.

I'm kinda sad that he's put his dick away.

Dragging me along the hallway, she stops outside a door that has a kiddy's name on it made from balloon-shaped alphabet letters.

J.I.M.M.Y.

My heart explodes.

When she pushes the door open, I gasp, then shriek; maybe I even black out for a moment.

It's perfect.


	33. Chapter 33

Perv

It's a fucking shrine to my youth, before, as my mother puts it, "her sweet boy disappeared."

Or, as I like to put it, when my dad disappeared.

Comic books, Star Wars action figures. But mostly... Harry Potter... everywhere.

Mom thought I loved the wizarding world. Truth was I loved to jack off to thoughts of Draco sucking my dick every night.

Punk can barely contain himself. Grinning like a fucking idiot, he giggles about how much fun the room is. Look at all the toys! She smiles wistfully and tells us she has a dessert to make; why don't we just play?

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

When his mom leaves, I hug my filthy mudblood and suck his neck a little. He's rigid in my arms. When I step back, it's pretty clear that he's blushing.

_Adorable._

I tell him that he must have been the luckiest kid in the world!

My dad used to have shit fits about useless toys. He can barely stand my surfboards; I keep them in my room.

Jimmy's bed is a sea of stuffed Disney characters so I dive in and cover myself with them, then flip over and wiggle my ass, asking if he wants to play for a while.


	34. Chapter 34

Perv

I'm dying here and he thinks this is so fucking funny.

I throw myself on top of him, taking him off guard. I press him into the mattress, and he gasps for air. Then he laughs, and asks if I turned into a bad guy so I could be more like Draco.

Pinning his arms above his head, I hump him slowly, whispering into his ear that he'd better shut the hell up. I'm not that kid anymore, and he'd better stop being such a little shit. My mom may think he's perfect but I know that he's a _very_ bad boy.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Finally, fucking finally, he slides his hands around my waist and expertly unfastens my pants. When he pulls me up in the middle before shimmying them down, he squeezes my hips, hard, and I moan.

His palm circles my ass cheeks, first the left, then the right, and I feel like I might be levitating, looking down on myself as my perfect perv leans in to bite my shoulder.

Fucking YUM.

Whispering harshly in my ear, he promises that I'm really in for it now. I've pushed him too far with all my lying.

Looking over my shoulder, I sigh, "Oh, Draco."


	35. Chapter 35

Perv

Draco.

I can't believe he just called me Draco.

My eyes dart from his lips to his ass to his lips again.

Shit.

It's like he knows just what to say every fucking time to get me pissed off, or horny, or both.

I bring my hand down, fast, and I'm not sure if it's a reward or a punishment.

He groans loudly, and I'm so turned on that I've forgotten where we are.

_Draco, Draco, Draco. _He moans over and over again, thrusting his hips back, begging for more.

Leaning over, I reach for his cock.

I want to make him come.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Oh, fuck yes.

I want to come too. I really, really do. Sucking him off at the table made me so hard it was almost painful.

Sticking my ass a little higher in the air, I give him more room for him to reach around.

He licks the back of my neck and I shiver. It's so hot when he does that and usually…_yes_…he bites right where he licks.

It takes me a moment to figure out what he's saying as he humps against my warm, tingling asscheeks. I can have a spanking or a blowjob.

My choice.

"Both, please."


	36. Chapter 36

Perv

Both. Of course he wants both, that selfish little shit.

I tell him that we don't have much time, and if he wants to get off he'd better do everything I say. I've never seen him so eager.

Strip.

Lay down.

Close your eyes.

Jerk yourself off.

He pouts at the last one, and whines that I said he would get a blowjob but I tell him to shut up._ Both hands, _I say. _Now._

I find some socks, and before he can stop me, I tie his wrists together, still wrapped around his cock.

He grins stupidly, the kinky bastard.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

He's perverted and I love that.

Tying my hands, then pulling me up by the fabric around my wrists, I end up standing on his bed.

"Brace yourself against the ceiling."

I've been told to do stranger things before, I guess. Raising my arms, I do exactly as instructed.

"Good."

His mouth on my balls makes me yelp, the groan, then beg for more.

He slaps my ass and my knees almost buckle. Pushing up against the ceiling again, I steady myself just as he swallows my dick.

I whimper and he spanks me three more times.

I feel my orgasm rise.


	37. Chapter 37

Perv

Jesus that was fast. My boy really is kinky. Before he can come all over me I cover him with my mouth again. He moans like we're the only ones in the house, and my mom isn't right downstairs somewhere.

His legs shake and before he falls I ease him down, so that he's sitting on the edge of the bed.

He smiles stupidly, then asks if we can do it again.

I say no fucking way, throw his clothes on his lap, and tell him to get dressed before my mom shows up.

Then I hear the door open.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

The expressions that cross my beautiful man's face are comical. First his eyes pop, next he takes in the way I hold up my bound hands, and his eyes roll. Then he narrows them as he yells, "PASSWORD?"

The door, which had started to open, is pulled almost closed again.

His mom's voice is small and embarrassed, "Really, Jimmy? I thought you'd grown out of this."

Yanking the socks from my wrists, he motions for me to hurry, so I stretch out and play with my pubes for a while.

He dresses me roughly while his mom suggests incorrect passwords.


	38. Chapter 38

Perv

"Dementor?" "Muggle?" "Draco?"

I shudder hearing my mother utter Draco's name. It's just fucking wrong.

Finally, I have Punk dressed. She says "wand" and I tell her to come in.

She tsks and says that I really need to grow up. I'm older than Riley is; I should be the mature one. At my age I'm lucky I found someone as sweet as Riley at all. Twenty-six is nearly over the hill!

I roll my eyes. I should've just let her find him naked.

Punk grins and thanks her for dinner.

She squeals. "Oh, I almost forgot! I have the _best _idea!"

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

She looks so determined – so fucking fixated – when she tells us that I should move in and take over her Jimmy's old room, that I step back.

Then her words sink in and I stare at her with my mouth hanging open.

I don't want to live with _her_.

I want to live with James.

Living with him is exactly what I want. He's exactly what I need.

Turning, I catch the evil grin on his face and I throw him a desperate look.

I imagine being trapped in this room, and can see why he left home at sixteen.


	39. Chapter 39

Perv

Serves him fucking right. Pulling all this shit with my mother. If he likes her so much he can fucking live with her.

I'm just about to tell Mom what a wonderful idea that is when Punk interrupts. He's so sorry, but he forgot about his study group tonight. There's a big exam. We've got to go... _now_.

I'm still laughing as he pushes me out the door. When I can breathe again I ask him about his test.

He hits me in the arm – hard – then tells me we're not going to study. We're going to Emmett's party.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Fuck, narrow escape!

I promise to come bake with her next week, then whisper to my sexy Slytherin that we MUST go to Em's party because he asked me especially. He looked for me on campus, and even left me a note on the whiteboard on my door saying to come, and to bring my boyfriend.

Invites to his parties are rare, like unicorns.

I don't like the way Jimmy smiles as he checks my seatbelt to be sure that it's fastened. He's far too calm considering I just used the B word for the first time.

Grinning, he asks if I knew that Em had a thing for him in high school.


	40. Chapter 40

Perv

Punk's mouth hangs open before it snaps shut and he demands to know if we're talking about the same guy.

Tall? Muscles? Blue eyes, dimples, and horny as fuck?

He mutters _shit_ and looks away.

The whole way there he doesn't say a word.

The party is loud and hard liquor is everywhere.

I follow him through the crowd and we run into Edward, who is completely wasted. Punk is already dancing, so I tell him I'm going to get us some drinks.

On the way back someone bumps into me, spilling rum and coke down the front of my jeans.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

Edward's even cuter when doesn't wear his glasses. The way he smiles so goofily and wraps his arms around my neck makes me want to take advantage. He kisses my throat, tells me that he's been in love with me forever, and asks what the chances are that we might fuck.

He calls me Jasper, and I giggle.

He's always the same. Give Edward a beer or three and he's all about the Texan.

Propping him against a wall, I turn just in time to see Emmett kneeling between my perv's legs, rubbing his general dick area, vigorously.

I growl.


	41. Chapter 41

Perv

It's like high school all over again.

Emmett on his knees in front of me, rubbing all over my dick.

I try to pull him up but he doesn't budge. He's even bigger than he used to be, and just as persistent. I yank his arm again and he finally looks up at me. His blue eyes sparkle and he grins.

Finally, I get him to his feet and he pulls me close. He whispers that he's _so_ sorry about that. He's such a klutz. I can borrow clothes from Edward if I want; he's about my size.

Follow him.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I thought Em was hot before I saw his hands all over MY perv. Now I think he's gross. And icky.

Pushing through the crowd I follow them, entering the hallway just as a door closes to a room at the end.

Fuck.

I'm at the door in an instant, ear pressed to the crack, but I can hardly hear a thing.

Double fuck.

Wiggling the handle, I start to vibrate with anger when I find it locked.

Hearing my idiot say, "Tell me what you want." makes me whine.

Em's muffled, "You." makes me hammer on the door.


	42. Chapter 42

Perv

Emmett still having the hots for me is amusing. Back in high school I was the senior bad boy and he was a freshman jock.

The moment we're in the room, he presses me against the door. His breath is in my face, and I can feel his hard cock. He starts kissing my neck, so I push him away.

He looks at me, drunk and confused. Stupidly, I ask what he wants. He replies, "You."

It's not funny anymore.

I grab his hand and he smiles, then lets me lead him to the bed.

Kneeling, I begin to explain that I just can't.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

No. Fucking. Way.

Panting, looking around wildly, I flail, feeling completely helpless.

Blinking, I think hard, then harder still, asking myself WWDD?

Hearing booming laughter from the party, relief rushes through me. Draco would totally accio up a battering ram.

I run into the mess of partying people and pogo up and down, trying to see over their heads. Yes!

Pulling Jake by the ponytail, I explain, kind of, "Jimmy… save Jimmy!"

It's really quite impressive how he knocks the door in with one kick, then makes an URGH noise when he realizes who Jimmy is.

I can't bear to look.


	43. Chapter 43

Perv

Shit. This isn't good.

My hands still on Emmett's knees, I look back. Punk looks like he's going to cry. Jake rolls his eyes. Then Punk lunges forward, beating Emmett with his fists.

I reach out, but Emmett rolls over him, trying to pin him down.

Everyone is fucking screaming.

I yell that Emmett better get the fuck off my man.

Jake yells the same thing.

Emmett screams that the little fucker kneed him in the nuts.

When Jake pulls Emmett off of Punk, they start beating the shit out of each other.

I pull Punk into my arms.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

One minute I'm being smothered by Em's huge chest after I launched my full body attack; the next I'm breathless and being squeezed half to death, face shoved into someone's shirt.

I sniff.

He smells like home.

Pulling away a little, I take in James' _I'm sorry _face, then sniff again.

He pulls me to him, holding the back of my head in the palm of one hand, rocking a little.

We both look up when the noise of battle stops. Em has a handful of Jake's hair; Jake has his arm across Em's throat.

When they kiss, I moan.


	44. Chapter 44

Perv

I should've known that this would happen; following Emmett was a bad idea. Punk could've been really hurt.

I pull him close and whisper that I'm sorry, so sorry.

He shakes a little and suddenly feels very small in my arms.

My mom is right. I need to take better care of him.

When Emmett and Jake fall quiet, I see that they're kissing. No, they're making out.

Gross.

I need to get us out of here. I think Punk can walk but he doesn't object when I carry him out of the room.

We really need to be alone.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

I like it when he carries me. He doesn't do it very often, not even if we're at the mall and I swear that my legs are really, really tired. I hang on tight and make the most of it.

Pacing down the hallway, he stops and kicks at each door until one swings open. Backing his way in, careful not to bump my head on the doorframe, he puts me to bed before turning to the door and locking it.

He starts with, "Nothing happened, Riley," and I nod.

I believe James.

I really do.

I just want to make him sweat.


	45. Chapter 45

Perv

I stand there for a while, shifting from foot to foot, feeling like a fucking idiot.

I said I'm sorry but he still looks so fucking sad. I guess now I have to figure out how to cheer him up, which isn't normal, 'cause usually Punk is the one trying to make me grin.

Pacing the room, thinking hard, I decide to do what I know he really likes.

I take off my shirt.

Then I take off my pants.

I growl, and then he groans.

I smile a little, but then I realize – it's not from him.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

The way James growls makes the hairs on the back of my neck rise.

And my dick.

But it just makes Mike Newton's eyes pop, and he fumbles with the lock, then hurls himself out into the hallway before either of us can move.

I can't help laughing.

I try to keep it in but it just keeps bubbling up.

I can't stop, even though I want to.

James shakes his head and mumbles that I live in a fucking zoo, and no wonder I get so confused about things, so easily distracted.

I pull him down on top of me.


	46. Chapter 46

Perv

When his laughter stops, I hump him hard, hoping his smile will return.

He stares at me all sad, so I sit back and groan.

I tell him I'm fucking sorry. I don't want Emmett. I swear I fucking don't.

His frown tells me I'll have to do better.

I glare, 'cause I've never had to fucking work to be with anyone before – ever.

When I demand that he just tell me what he fucking wants from me, he yells out something I don't expect.

He says he wants to wake up with me tomorrow. That's all. Tomorrow and every day after that.

* * *

><p><span>Punk<span>

The moment I shout out what it is I've really wanted, I shut my eyes real tight.

Then I blurt some more.

_He_ never finished college and his life seems pretty perfect, so why do_ I_ have to stay in stupid school? All I want to do is dance and fuck my gorgeous boyfriend. Why should I have to listen to my dad?

I think I might be pouting.

I swear I'll run away.

My perv hugs me hard, whispering that if I run he'll just have to chase me and we both know what would happen next.

He smiles, and I smile back.

.

The End (for now)

* * *

><p>Thanks for coming along on another crazy ride with these boys. For those who have been asking about the outtake where Punk met Perv's mom, it will be posted soon.<p> 


End file.
